How Mental Health, Entrepreneurship and Purpose are Connected
Running a business essentially takes all the existential questions you deal with in a Generalized Anxiety Disorder and runs you through them, over and over again. Where am I going with this? What am I doing? What if I fail? It exasperates all the symptoms of my disorder, but in some unexpected ways has also helped. I have to set the anxieties aside and keep moving, no matter how loud they get (although sometimes, they do definitely win). Being an entrepreneur has also forced me to live life in a very different way - many different ways, really. But the main difference is no matter what I do, I need to do it with purpose. I need to remember the bigger purpose. The driving force. The reason I am living this life.
It's easy to get swept up in the day to day business. The "busy-ness" of being a human. When that happens, I feel lost and can't figure out my next step. The anxiety kicks in, depression starts taking over, and I can easily get swept under.
My business and mental health are tightly woven together - when I lose my way in one it shows up in the other. If I get caught up in paying bills, making money, managing projects, whatever, my anxiety starts nitpicking every detail about myself. My body, my future, my past decisions. I lose sight of the bigger picture and can't find my way to my next step.
I've learnt that when this happens I need to either dive into the depths or stop fighting the current. I need to PAUSE, stop moving, and gain my bearings. The more I struggle and try to push through, the more lost I get. But when I stop to remember my WHY, my steps forward become clear again. The blockages, fears and anxieties lift and I can trust again.