Is Personal Style a Performance?

The other day, I read an article discussing how putting in the effort to pull together an outfit is performing oneself, and it’s been stuck in my mind.

I remember being little, maybe grade 5, and wearing a shirt I was so excited about—it was black with sparkly gold wings on it. I loved it, until someone made fun of me. I think that's around the time I started dressing to make others like me, obsessing over how every outfit would be perceived, how my body looked, what others would think of me.

It’s not lost on me that I was doing this in every other area of my life as well. It was exhausting.

As I started to build confidence within, rather than turning to others for validation, I got to know myself & what I liked. I started wearing what I wanted, and what felt good on my body, regardless of what others might think.

I still notice this pattern of performing for others when I’m feeling unsure of myself. When I have an event that’s triggering imposter syndrome, or when I’m feeling burnt out and low. I’ll spend so much time and energy putting together an outfit I think says something about me, that others will like, instead of wearing what I really want, in hopes of easing the anxiety.

Here’s the thing, though: I still end up feeling anxious (sometimes even more so). In wearing something that doesn’t feel right, I’m telling myself that who I am isn’t enough. That I’m not good enough.

When I can take a breath and come back to myself, though, I remember that personal style is exactly that - personal. It’s something I do, just for me, that brings me joy. It has the power to shift how I feel, inspire me, and remind me of who I am. When I anchor in that, it’s not a performance—it’s my foundation of who I am and how I move through the world.

One of my favourite outfits recently was an oversized t-shirt, a vintage blazer and my Luna Trousers. I loved looking down when I was working from home, seeing the shirt I wore the day we brought our daughter home from the hospital, designed by an artist I admire and purchased from a dear friend's shop, paired with pants I’ve designed and created myself.

Clothing is powerful. Wearing something I love, no matter what it is or who will see it, reminds me that I am enough—I am creative, resilient, and strong, and I deserve to feel both beautiful and comfortable.